Picture the scene: So you had a massive dispute on where to go with the other half on holiday. You wanted something fairly energetic perhaps involving a combination of rented cars, epic sights, and beer. She, meanwhile, has been feeling pale and unattractive recently and wants a relaxing beach holiday involving deck chairs, spa days, and gossip magazines – just the sort of thing men hate.
Instead of thumbing through a paperback with sandy fingers while being dazzled by the mid-day sun, here are some enlightening, albeit possibly impractical activities to while away the days before it’s time to go home.
1. Build a giant sand sculpture on the beach
This has a rather entrepreneurial element to it as well – replicating the Great Pyramids of Giza or a giant face is sure to attract quite a lot of attention. If you’re willing to stand around it for long enough, you could even charge other tourists for photos posing with it.
2. Treat your partner like royalty
They’re probably the ones dragged you here in the first place, aren’t they? In which case, if you can get them in the right mood for long enough, they may be willing to check out earlier and transfer to a hotel allowing the kind of things you want to do – your copious amounts of new-found affection may attract a certain amount of suspicion though, so take care to keep your lavish treatment subtle.
3. Dig a large booby trap
As stupid as it sounds, digging a large 3 foot pit in the sand and covering with something innocuous like a beach towel can provide hours of mirth as unobservant beach goers fall blindly in. Honestly. However, you may have to run away if someone who looks like a 6 foot 5 bulldog falls in and detects an air of guilt around your person.
4. Hunt for sea shells
While nothing seems more sterile than a proud collection of sea shells strewed around the bathroom when you visit someone’s house, secretly you’re quite jealous, aren’t you?
Some people in the far corners of the globe make a living hunting down rare shells – while you’re not very likely to find anything approaching profitable, there are some beautiful specimens to be had if you have the time to look. And remember, new ones get washed up every day, giving this pastime some sustainability.
5. Float out to sea
While it’s hard to satisfy the average guy’s quest for adventure in the limited confines of a beach resort, there’s more things to keep you occupied than you might think. Many shops stock inflatable beds of the type used in swimming pools. You should be able to to substitute a paddle from some flotsam washed up on the beach. If you don’t instantly snag a rock whilst casting off, you’ll feel like Robinson Crusoe escaping his island of captivity, except, in your case, with better food and Pina Coladas on demand. Lucky you.
Photo of seals on the beach by g-hat
Topic: How to Tuesday |
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Tags: beach
About the author
Paul Crompton is an avid reader and has a passion for cars and technology, primarily. He loves traveling to whichever exotic travel location which is cheap. His dream is to become an advertising executive.
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